If I Should Die Before I'm Woke

​If I should die before I'm woke, don't sanitize my imageLie my thoughts in state but leave me as I was, don't scrub me cleanWrestle with the things I said,then amended,then sured down on because I was growing and I sometimes changed my mindIf I should die before I'm woke,tell my entire storynot just the parts that fit your image of meDon't erase my former selfSpeak of the conservatism and religiosity in my youthand of my tension with faith and empire in the same breathBecause before I loved peace, I justified violenceI can only accept justice or love as parts of my legacyif my journey is held in tactand I am rendered wholeIf I should die before I'm woke and my personhood is whitewashedBaptize me in rainbow hued waters, anoint me with ebony, coconut oil, and cocoa butterThen ensure that all depictions of me are stained with Ruby WooMake it your business to paint me unapologetically Queer, Black, and Femmebecause I found myself by accepting what others used to marginalize meIf I should die before I'm woke,Cringe at my misstepsRebuke my sense of callousnessPoint to the places where I tried but still didn't get it rightBecause God is God and I am notso I need my humanity to be upheldFind ways to root me to the dustfor it's in holding me accountable that you can see what work is left to do